Oof, I don’t know about you, but I’m still having a hard time finding my bearings in reality. I suppose it’s meant to be. Try as I may to return to routines and projects, I’m just not finding my way back to the groove. Last night was a night of deep dreams. I had one of those long, long dreams that last all night and that you keep returning to as you fall back asleep. I even got in some moments of lucid flying above cold forest trees illuminated by nothing but moonlight. The dream was stunning yet chilling, gorgeous and scary. The landscape was most certainly fueled by my recent trip to forested and snow-covered Lake Tahoe. The narrative, however, borrowed from my common fears. I woke up confused, unsure of who I was, or of what was wrong. I asked the cards, “what is the truth”, and “where is this going?”

For the “truth”, to my surprise, I got The Magician. To me this card can speak of creating in the world through control of the self, which often involves discipline. That makes total sense because that’s what I’ve been grappling with lately. Not that motivation and discipline is all there is to life—no, no. But when you made specific commitments for growth, and you can’t rise up to meet what’s coming up, it can be quite discouraging. All this water feels like it is damping my fire. It seems to be the point of this season. But something else that caught my attention on The Magician is that the elements are swimming around him. Things are up in the air. So maybe that’s why we’re here in these waters: to shake things up, to review our commitments, to come to a fresh understanding as to our possibilities. We are undergoing a little revolution in our relationship with reality and with our life, its goals, its dreams. Instead of feeling like I’m drowning, I’m being invited to remember that anything is possible. The call is to break down our personal paradigms and see how they rebuild themselves.

“Where is this going?” The Fool. Already today I’ve seen The Fool showing up on several other readers’ posts. The zodiacal year is ending, loves. And it starts again. The Magician + Fool combination speaks to me of getting lost so we can be found again. Of tearing down our personal constructs so that we can start afresh come the new beginnings of Aries. Aries is the child, too, and this Fool is like a child spirit. So what that not everything makes sense? Release the tight grasp on things. So what that I can’t find motivation? It will return soon enough. Enthusiasm will return, and it will be fueled by the fresh possibilities and the new dreams of today.

The Magician is Number 1, and The Fool is Number 0. Spirit holds our hands as go back to a sea of nothingness to be cleansed; to drown and die and come back again. Also, these numbers together show Number 10. This is the end of a cycle, and the beginning of a new one. And we’re not talking about the smaller cycles of everyday life. No, this is a big one. Can you feel its strength? It’s like the world is a wheel, and right now we can sense the tremors of its turnings.

Sorry if this reading is loose, and long, and repetitive of messages I’ve already given in the past week. I’m surprised I’m even writing this. Take good care of yourselves. Be gentle. Be free, as much as you can. Savor the dreams, they are extra delicious right now.